Happy 35th Birthday, Mom!

But you don't look a day over 34.
Love,
#1 Son

'Twas the night before Christmas...

...and all through the land,
Not a creature was stirring,
Except for poor Dad.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
as Dad wrapped the last present with mere minutes to spare.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of diagrams danced in Dad's head.

And Mama in her jammies, not wearing a cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,
When downstairs in the garage there arose such a clatter,
she sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

"Sorry," said Dad, as he picked up his tools,
"I should have paid more attention in school.
I didn't know I'd need an engineering degree,
To assemble a bike for a child, age three."

His eyes -- how they drooped! His countenance how wan!
Muscles drawn taut, trying to force a piece on.
His grim little mouth was drawn up in a grimace,
As he said, "Hand me my shears; I'm just going to trim this."

Mama smiled and said, "Can I help you at all?"
Dad replied, "No dear, I've just hit a wall.
I'll be done in no time, don't worry your head."
Mama said, "Okay, honey," then went back to bed.

A monkey wrench he held tight in his teeth,
And the bicycle's chain 'round his head like a wreath
He had a dour face and a little round belly,
From eating too much of the cranberry jelly.

Not to mention the cookies left out for St. Nick,
Dad polished those off, and he did it right quick.
"After all," explained Dad to the toys he was wrapping,
"I'm gonna need fuel to keep me from napping."

"After I finish this bike, you see,
It will already be seven minutes to three.
And while the children continue to snore,
I've got to make sure that this dino will roar."

Then he laughed and got back to his fatherly duties,
Assembling and wrapping and dropping tools on his footies.
And when the last present was under the tree,
He admired his handiwork, then dropped to his knees.

He gave thanks to Jesus for making him "Dad."
For his wife and his children and all that he had.
Then he finally crept into bed, only to hear,
"Wake up, Dad! It's Christmas! Santa was here!"

-Nathan Beach, December 26th, 2008
Merry Christmas!

Things That Make Me Happy, Part Deux

Every year, on Thanksgiving Day, I begin rereading "The Lord of the Rings." (Yes, I know that it should be underlined and not put in quotes, since it is a book, but I apparently do not have that option here.) It is my favorite book and since the movies were released in three consecutive Decembers, this time of year always makes me think of Tolkien. So, in 2003 I decided that I would reread the books annually, starting on Thanksgiving Day. It seemed like a good day to start, partially because it is easy to remember and partially because always starting on the same day appeals to my minor (undiagnosed) case of OCD. (and probably Tourette's) At any rate, reading "The Lord of the Rings" always makes me happy. I especially love being reminded of little parts that I had forgotten about. For example, early in "The Fellowship of the Ring," Pippin sings a song while in the bath. It goes like this:

Sing hey! for the bath at close of day

that washes the weary mud away!

A loon is he that will not sing:

O! Water Hot is a noble thing!

O! Sweet is the sound of falling rain,

and the brook that leaps from hill to plain;

but better than rain or rippling streams

is Water Hot that smokes and steams

O! Water cold we may pour at need

down a thirsty throat and be glad indeed;

but better is Beer, if drink we lack,

and Water Hot poured down the back.

O! Water is fair that leaps on high

in a fountain white beneath the sky;

but never did fountains sound so sweet

as splashing Hot Water with my feet!

I had forgotten that last year I decided that I was going to sing this to Xander every day at bath time. Of course, I tried a couple of times but never quite memorized it, so I stopped singing it. Maybe I'll try again this year...except for the Beer part. I'll say "apple juice" instead. Apple juice makes Xan happy.

Being a teacher means having no shame...

November 26, 2008 shall henceforth be known as "Scottish Teaching Day." Our school is divided into "continents," with each continent consisting of 7 or 8 homerooms. My homeroom is part of Africa. For this year's canned food drive, rather than being a competition between homerooms, it was turned into a competition between continents. I told my homeroom that if Africa won, I would teach them wearing a skirt. Africa had not won any of the various competitions throughout the year so far, so I felt that I was safe. Well, one of the OTHER homerooms in Africa ended up with 800 cans of food for the week, trouncing every other class. Therefore, Africa won the whole darn thing. Meaning I had to teach in a skirt. Luckily (this was also the reason I said I would teach in a skirt in the first place), I own a kilt. So Wednesday, November 26th became "Scottish Teaching Day." I either raised or lowered my cool factor on that day. I think...both.

Scottish Teaching Day